Meet girls after breakup
21.08.2017
Dating girls after a breakup is a challenge which, nevertheless, comes with benefits. Unlike usual dating, this case requires some help. There are things you need to know about girls dating after a breakup. Serious relationships tend to have a lot of different long-term effects. So, there are obstacles for you to overcome if you want everything to be as perfect as possible. Here are some dating after a breakup rules that might help you.
Don’t Be in a Rush and Stay Patient
When you’re dating a girl who just got out of a serious relationship, the last thing you want to do is to rush things. It is more than preferable to be patient and allow everything to go more slowly than usual. Forget about first date kiss or third date sexual contact. These expectations are inappropriate with girls dating after a breakup. Remember the fact that she suffered a personal trauma of emotional kind. Treat her accordingly and don’t be too demanding. Keep a low and steady pace letting her know you better and allow her to be cautious as much as she wants. She will let you know when she is ready to change just dating to something bigger and more serious.
Most girls after a breakup are vulnerable. For obvious reasons they fear that a new relationship could end just like their last one. It is natural to think so. One failure doesn’t mean that there is no love at all, though. The fact that she’s already meeting you should be pleasant because she values you even though she is cautious about relationships in general. Girls after breakup are very cautious. It means that you should double your efforts and decrease the amount of your demands. Sound harsh but that is true. However, with each step the journey will be better and better. What starts hard becomes easier with time. Don’t expect everything to be easy in the beginning. When dating a girl who just broke up, the beginning is the hardest part.
She Is Not an Easy Prey
Under no circumstances treat her like used goods or an easy prey. In fact, dating immediately after a breakup is much harder than usual dating. Keep in mind the statistics: almost half of people who are dating are recovering from a breakup. Therefore, be easy about this fact and approach her casually when occasion is right. Still, what you’re doing is a challenge but when done right the reward is high.
Don’t Bring Up Her Ex
Never ever start talking about her ex. Don’t even think about asking what kind of man he is or how did they break up unless she herself brings this topic up. At some point you may be curious about the reason she broke up with her ex but you need to overcome your curiosity for the sake of your relationship. If she wants to talk about it, be understanding and compassionate. Don’t judge her ex in order to compliment her. In other words, don’t take sides and jump to conclusions. Just hear her out and support her with your care.
Be Supportive and Understanding
You should always be supportive and understanding whether in a relationship or not, during dating or at any point of your communication with other people. Express sympathy, be ready to listen and not just talk all the time about yourself. Be compassionate about what she is trying to overcome. Psychologists say that emotional pain people experience after breakups with their loving ones is really unbearable. A lot of people start to drink or use drugs excessively in order to relieve pain which they can’t tolerate. Remember that a breakup is not a walk in the park but a trauma. Even a person who initiates a breakup suffers. Therefore, be tolerant.
How to Impress a Girl after Her Breakup
The answer is obvious – be the one she won’t ever want to live. Choose the girl you have strong feelings for. This is easy to say but difficult to do. Therefore, always remember who you are dating and what do you want from dating. The best way for you to impress her is to show that you are responsible, caring, and reliable. She needs comfort and care more than ever because she suffers from a failed relationship. Be confident and show your best sides. Express your interest in her and act to make her interested in yourself. Show her who you are. Don’t pretend but be yourself. For example, if you like going to the cinema or theater, take her with you and talk about things you have passion for.
Express confidence in your relationship. Speaking otherwise, you should think like “this is the one” even if you don’t really feel so all the time. When you date a girl who just got out of serious relationship, you can’t afford being insecure about it. So, again, be confident. Choose carefully and then stick to your decision. Avoid inconsistency. Look past some of her unattractive traits or character flaws. This is a challenge you vouched for. She will certainly notice your attitude and make it up to you later in the future. Be above offenses and don’t overreact to anything that feels bad about your relationship. She might be very emotional. This can make her overreact or become offended when there is no real reason for acting so. Therefore, be patient.
Serious Commitment
One thing you definitely need to know about girls after a breakup is that they really want to be involved in a new relationship. They are cautious which, superficially, can make you think they are not really ready for something new. However, this is not so. Dating specialists say that most people try to find a new partner almost immediately after a breakup.
Only in certain rare cases when trauma is too difficult to get over instantly a person needs some time to recover. In most cases, though, partners who break up foresee their break up. Moreover, a lot of people come from one relationship straight to another one. It is truly hard to follow an algorithm here because there is no certain system which works for all. In any case, don’t let her think that what is going on between you is something inappropriate. In loneliness, people get better longer and harder than in the company of people they trust.
You should define your objectives correctly. What you’re dating the girl for? If you’re not aiming for something serious and you are not ready to make a commitment, be straight about it. However, girls who went through a breakup only pretend they are not looking for something serious when, in fact, they are. They are looking for something that can compensate for a hole in their life. They can’t simply replace a caring partner with something that is not equally serious. Typically, there are people who like to get involved in long-term relationships for the sake of creating a family and those who are not. Therefore, define what kind of a person you and the girl you’re dating are.
If you think you have advice to give a girl after a break up, forget about it. She is not your patient, she is not helpless, and she definitely doesn’t want to appear as a person with a burden. Most probably, she won’t ever ask for such advice. So, don’t pretend you’re a dating counselor or a psychiatrist. You can help by simply being by her side if she wants it. Don’t tell her what to do and what not to do.
Don’t Ruminate
Rumination is similar to obsession. Try not to think all the time that you’re dating a girl who just got out of a relationship. See her as a normal person. Follow the advice but don’t give away that you’re going to some extremes or make an effort because she may be difficult to date at times. Thinking all the time about her previous relationship won’t be useful. In a couple of months of successful dating she will get better only because you’re with her.
Make Her Feel Comfortable and Safe
There is one very significant advice on how to date after a breakup. You should allow the girl be independent. It means that when you start dating a girl, she should have all the freedom to do what she wants. It doesn’t mean that you should subdue to her desires and follow her everywhere doing exactly what she asks you to do. No, it means being moderate in your demands and more than just understanding about her demands. Usually, it is perfect when partners meet each other halfway. In our case, though, you need to go further and allow her feel free while dating you.
A girl that experienced a breakdown can decrease the level of stress with the benefits of being single. However, dating such girl means allowing her to feel single even though she is dating you. So, don’t be offended when she didn’t call or wants to skip a meeting. Perhaps, she fears to be attached. Let her be on her own for some time. You can even play hard to get a little because it is more preferable than force yourself on her.
In the beginning of dating a girl after breakup may feel like sitting on two chairs at the same time. She wants you and she doesn’t want you. Don’t be surprised with such behavior. Yes, it is inconsistent but serious reasons demand her to act in such way. Be understanding because, believe it, it will pass with time. Again, be very patient.
It was said earlier that the girl may want you and may not want you at the same time. In other words, she doesn’t know what she wants. Your task is to make your intentions known so she could make a choice. You should also understand her indecisiveness. Don’t blame it on her character or mood. It all comes down to her previous relationships. Dating immediately after a breakup, she will heal in front of you and with you to make it faster. Therefore, you are expected to be more than just okay. Again, this is a challenge, so be ready and prepared.
The Benefits of Dating a Girl after Her Breakup
So, now that you know everything about responsibility, challenges, and difficultie,s it is time to point out the benefits. The first and the main one is that she has experience. She has experience of a serious long-term relationship. This is a huge benefit. It is difficult to succeed at the first attempt. Breakups make people more mature and skilled in romantic relationships. Girls learn from their mistakes and mistakes of their partners. A partner who is experienced is not a neurotic with trauma who can’t succeed in love but a person who progresses and grows.
It is easier to be a shining knight when your help is really needed. Girls after breakup need a comforter and a caretaker, so you have a perfect opportunity to connect with them. You can be a good boyfriend because they expect you to understand them. You have a chance to make everything right by them because girls after a breakup need to be taken care of occasionally. Therefore, you can be a gentleman without forcing your help on them because they, in fact, really need your help.
Consider everything that was said before you go on a date with a girl who just broke up. Remember not to bring up her ex, not to rush things, and not to be obsessed with her emotional pain. Be patient and reliable. Look past her troubles but also be compassionate about them. Don’t forget that you’re overcoming a challenge to achieve something bigger. An experienced girl will more likely satisfy you in a long-term perspective using what she learnt from her mistakes. We all do them, so be understanding. Good luck!
