How to create sexual tension
15.04.2019
Each of us thought that they lacked sexual attraction. Do you know what sexual tension between a man and a woman is and how to use it when dating a girl?
What Is Sexual Tension?
Sexual attraction is a special behavior of two people towards each other, the ultimate goal of which is mutual sexual satisfaction. From time to time, the views on sexual tension has differed drastically, starting with the idea that people shouldn’t manifest sexual tension to the idea that it should be manifested freely. As well as beginning with the idea that sexual tension is something that our mind cannot control and to the idea that sexual tension can be easily controlled by consciousness. But there are too many factors that may influence sexual tension, such as the cultural aspects of the country you live in, your social life, living conditions, and of course, according to Freud, your upbringing.
But, to cut the long story short, you should just mind that passion is great when we own it, and it may turn terrible when we mindlessly follow it. Now, when you know what sexual tension is, it’s time to move on.
Signs of Sexual Tension
When it comes to sexual tension, we often feel confused. How do you know if you have sexual tension with someone? It is not something that we can tell right away, especially when we are young. While the older generation kinda collected the wisdom on how to figure out whether there is sexual tension between two people, nowadays things are way simpler. You simply have the Internet, where you can check out the signs of sexual tension. No, don’t run away and start looking for them elsewhere. To help you, we’ve collected them here. So, if you’re wondering how to tell if there’s sexual tension, we offer you to check out the signs of it here.
All insight
They look at their library book and then start glancing at you through the pages. Your eyes meet, and you can't take your eyes off them. When you are in a room, it doesn't matter who else is there. Yes, these are signs of sexual attraction. And when you talk to them, they lean closer. You feel a craving for them, and you do not want to come off, and it seems that they feel the same. They look at you again. It may look soft.
Body never lies
When you are with them, they smile a lot and lean towards you. They can touch you on your shoulder or on your arm, apparently, only to be near you and touch you. The body and voice of that person seem relaxed, not strained. They will stand high, and their body will lean towards you, not from you when they speak. They will probably nod when you nod, and they may unknowingly reflect — or copy — your movements. If you cross your legs while sitting, they can do the same. If you tilt your head, that person can tilt their head the same way.
Notice laughter
They laugh at your jokes, and it seems they sincerely think you're funny. You're funny, but you didn't know that you're so funny. They like to be with you, and they fascinate you, and your jokes seem original to them.
Mind that the words “them” and “their” were used on purpose. While you may be wondering where separate sections for sexual tension signs in a man and in a woman, you won’t find them here. You may think that men and women are different as much as you like, but when it comes to sexual tension things are pretty much the same. People express their sexual tension in the same way. The difference may arise based on the individuality of some particular person, but not based on their sex.
Sexual Tension at Work
So, now you have kinda learned the signs of sexual tension. So, you can easily figure out when your friend is expressing their sexual tension towards you. Oh, wait for a second! You’re not friends yet? Are you just coworkers? Well, there are signs of sexual tension between coworkers, just for you.
Eye contact
One of the first signs of sexual tension at work is when you continue to meet with each other's gaze. If you find that whenever you look up, one of your colleagues is looking at you, it may happen because they are in love with you. Do you want to catch a glance at one person in the office? Do you look at each other longer than usual? You might find that you blush and look away, but then you look back?
Excuses to come
Do you find excuses to go and talk to a specific colleague, or do you find that they always seem to ask you questions or come to you for communication? If it is so, sexual tension may increase.
Flirty talk
Are you always joking about having sex? Does someone deliberately praise you? Or do sexy hints? Do you think that regardless of what you are talking about, the conversation always becomes sexual?
Spend lunch breaks together
Do you always go to lunch together or take time in the breaks for a quick chat? If you spend as much free time together as possible during the working day, it becomes clear that something is happening between you.
How to Tell If Sexual Tension Is Mutual?
If you are flattered by the fact that they like your jokes, and this makes you want to be with them more, then this is a part of the chemistry that you share, this is an inexplicable sexual tension that tells you are more than just friends. When this magnetic chemistry develops further, you begin to communicate in a secret code known only to you two. Basically, if all the above-mentioned signs are present, and you both feel extremely horny, then you don’t have to look any further, you definitely experience mutual sexual tension.
How to Build Sexual Tension?
Sometimes sexual tension doesn’t appear on its own. When you like each other, but both are not sure whether you are feeling the same, creating sexual tension can solve your problems. But if you are not sure about whether your feelings are mutual, you need to be extremely careful, as, surely, you don’t want your sexual tension to be confused with harassment. So, don’t get overly flirtatious and extremely touchy when you’re trying to create sexual tension. Building sexual tension is closer to art then you might have thought. That’s why you need to learn a thing or two about it before expressing yourself to your object of desire. Mind that you need to get you both in the mood, not just yourself. So, let’s not waste any time and let’s delve right into tips on how to create sexual tension.
Touch almost accidentally
When you like someone, you can get to expressing your sexual tension by touches. But remember what we have said about getting extremely touchy. It can be a light touch on their shoulder or back of their hand. It doesn’t mean that you need to grab them. Just a light touch and nothing more. If your interest is mutual, the object of your desire is going to return your touch. Thus, allowing you to figure out whether the sexual tension between you is mutual or not.
Look in their eyes
When you are talking, make eye contact. If they are not trying to put their eyes away, then you are on the right path. When you are looking deep in someone’s eyes, it shows that you are interested in that person and intrigued by them. But mind that it must be a normal look. Don’t look at them in a creepy way. You may simply scare the person away.
Flirt
This may seem so obvious that this point feels needless, but a lot of people forget about flirting. Another problem that a lot of people confuse flirting with talking about sex directly. There is a difference between a flirt and talking about what would you like to do with the object of your desire in bed. Flirting is more of hints on what you’d like to do with the person you are interested in, then laying it on the line.
Pull and push them
When you understand that it is definitely sexual tension between you, you enhance it by pulling them closer to yourself and then pushing them away. Creating such a dynamic is the best way to boost sexual tension. You can do it both physically and verbally. Physically, you can lean on them or whisper something in their ear. Verbally, you can use phrases like, “I keep thinking of you, but I’m not sure that you are completely ready to accept me” or “You’re giving it a good try, maybe one day you’ll get it.” But mind that you shouldn’t overdo it, as it may escalate to your object of desire losing any interest in you.
How to Handle Sexual Tension?
We’ve been discussing the positive sexual tension, in other words, the one which is mutual. But there are cases when your sexual desire for the person will be left unrequited, or it can be mutual, but both of you are not single. So, how to deal with sexual tension like that? Well, the rules are quite simple. Stay away from each other. You must think about everything that you can lose in this case. You should shut down the possibility from the very start. But regarding the fact that later you may face the problems with unresolved sexual tension, aside from the above-mentioned rules, you need to consult your shrink, as professional advice is always better than some random article that you came across while digging the Internet.
