Is my boyfriend no longer interested in me sexually

15.03.2023

Why is my boyfriend not interested in me sexually? Sex is a very important part of a relationship, but at some point, a couple may encounter the fact that one of the partners feels a decrease in sexual desire and has no desire to have sex.

It is customary to blame stress for not wanting sex. Of course, this condition really plays a big role, but do not forget about other causes of hormonal changes, sexually transmitted infections, poor lifestyle, etc.

Can sexuality disappear?

If you tell yourself my boyfriend doesn't want to have sex with me, don't start looking for flaws in yourself. Humans are sexual beings from birth. Sexuality is a natural property of a person, like breathing; it cannot disappear, it is a built-in option, but it changes throughout life along with the development of the whole personality as a whole.

Why don't I enjoy sex anymore with my boyfriend? The concept of sexuality includes many elements: temperament, how much you like yourself and whether you like to touch yourself, whether you are open to the touch of loved ones, how well you know yourself and your body, and your desires. Do you consider yourself attractive, as well as the cultural norms and restrictions of the community in which you live? Adolescence is a period of hormonal activity. Increased excitability and enough minimal stimulation. Maturity is characterized by multitasking and responsibility. And energy is needed not only for sex. And libido (aka sexual energy, the energy of life), we have one for everything. Therefore, you have to choose what to direct it to in the first place. In addition, the stimuli that are aroused in youth due to novelty and hormonal surge no longer work. Adults are more selective in their sexuality. These are psychologically adults. My boyfriend has no interest in me sexually. Sex and sexuality go together, but they are not synonymous. Sex is sexual behavior and intimate relationships. You can't separate sex from sexuality. The sexual constitution is a temperament, and this is an innate value.

Why does the sex drive disappear?

If you are increasingly noticing that my boyfriend doesn't seem interested in me sexually anymore or my boyfriend doesn't like sex, then here are a few reasons why a couple’s sexual attraction to each other decreases:

• disorders associated with the somatic health of one of the partners (vascular, hormonal, neurological, mental difficulties, and diseases);

• psychogenic disorders that have arisen in one of the partners, resulting from traumatic emotional experiences;

• imaginary sexual disorders, when it seems to us that we have some problems in the sexual sphere, and these thoughts and experiences capture a person so much that they can lead to a decrease in desire and other difficulties;

• marital disharmony when the sexual preferences of partners do not match, there is dissatisfaction with sexual relations, misunderstandings, tension in relationships, conflicts begin to arise, and, as a result, a decrease in attraction;

• low level of sexual culture in both or one of the partners (sexual culture is understood as a set of norms, values, and attitudes in the field of sexual relations, as well as the corresponding patterns of sexual behavior). This point is of particular interest since it includes knowledge of one's own sexuality and that of a partner, the range of acceptability of sexual techniques, the level of sexual education in general, and the ability to maintain and develop sexual relationships and the erotic space of relationships, and much more. If this is not taken care of, then sex becomes an unattractive routine, which also leads to a decrease in attraction;

• Difficulties in relationships between partners, misunderstanding, neglect, and lack of emotional closeness also have a serious impact on the degree of attraction. In such cases, you can often conclude that my boyfriend can't keep up with me sexually;

• high levels of stress, chronic fatigue, and poor mental and physical health can also lead to a decrease in attraction.

Causes of decreased libido

If you think my new boyfriend doesn't seem interested in me sexually, then you need to look for the reasons for this behavior. You can also say I don't feel sexually wanted by my boyfriend.

Low libido, when you do not want sex at all, can affect both men and women. A person's interest in sex often fluctuates in different periods of life due to hormonal changes, age, and stress. There may be a decrease in libido in women even in their 20s. The reasons why you do not want sex can be both psycho-emotional and physiological.

• Hormonal disorders. Why doesn't he want me sexually anymore? Sex and hormones are directly related. In the female body, between 30 and 45 years of age, there is a decrease in estrogen levels, due to which the vaginal muscles become less elastic, and the genitals secrete much less lubrication. To find out why you no longer want sex and solve this problem, you need to take an analysis that determines the number of hormones in the thyroid gland and hormones in the blood (the thyroid gland and sex are interconnected). Based on the results of the tests, the attending physician will refer the patient to an endocrinologist or sexologist for further treatment. If a man does not want sex, the reasons may lie in low testosterone. Testosterone levels affect sex drive. A decrease in testosterone is a normal occurrence in the aging process. However, with a sharp drop in testosterone (decrease in libido), you should consult a urologist.

• Diseases. Why am I not turned on by my boyfriend anymore? The reasons why you do not want intimacy may lie in diseases that reduce sexual desire. The most common example is sexually transmitted infections. STIs do not appear immediately and have a more detrimental effect on the female body. Such diseases cause discomfort and pain, which is why you may not want sex. To rule out an STI, you need to have regular check-ups with your doctor, even if you don't have symptoms. This is especially true when changing sexual partners and the appearance of suspicious signs (for example, burning during urination).

• My boyfriend has lost interest in me sexually. Many non-sexual conditions can also affect sex drive, including arthritis, cancer, diabetes, high blood pressure, coronary heart disease, and neurological disease. Therefore, if something else bothers you, be sure to contact your doctor to establish the real reason why there is no desire to make love.

• The influence of drugs. Lack of desire for sex can cause many medications. Often, oral contraceptives give a similar effect, especially in the first days of taking, until the body adapts to a new drug. Antidepressants that regulate serotonin levels can also lower sexual desire. My boyfriend is not interested in me sexually. If the problem is oral contraceptives, you should consult a doctor to replace them. When it comes to antidepressants, the first step is to lower your dose and watch for side effects. In case of their presence, the right decision will be to change the drug or add a corrective medicine to it, which the doctor must decide. Other drugs that may affect why a boyfriend is not interested in sex:

• antipsychotics that increase prolactin levels;

• medicines for an enlarged prostate;

• painkillers;

• medicines for high blood pressure.

What to do when your boyfriend doesn't want you sexually?

It is essential to start solving the problem by talking, building phrases using “I-statements,” and focusing on your feelings, feelings.

Be sure to support your partner and express your feelings about this conversation (which is very difficult and disturbing for you to talk about it); talk about your feelings, and not about what your partner is doing; voice wishes and requests, emphasizing their significance for you, and not on the shortcomings or shortcomings of the partner. Remember that sex is a couple's act, and here you are, allies trying to improve the joint that is important for both of you. If it's hard to get started, then again, you can contact a specialist who will help you deal with anxiety and anxiety before talking, which will help you find words. After all, no one except you knows the peculiarities of your communication and the "code" words and expressions to which your partner reacts in one way or another.

Is it possible to save a relationship in which there is no more sex?

Why won't my boyfriend have sex with me anymore? It can’t be that everything was good and suddenly it became bad. Something changed in the relationship between the two people over time, but the situation was allowed to take its course, and they preferred not to see discord. Can a relationship be saved? In the form in which the relationship came to the point “everything is bad, it’s impossible to continue like this,” they ended. There is a choice to part or build a relationship with the same person, but again.

Relationships are many factors that connect people with common interests, life, friendly communication, working, and creative partnership.

All about different forms of relationships. And love has nothing to do with sex. Do you love your friend but don't have sex with him? In the same way, in a marital relationship, you can love your spouse but not want to have sex with him; it happens. How comfortable you are in such a relationship is a personal choice. A person can remain in a monogamous relationship for as long as he likes if he made a conscious choice of a partner. Initially, there was bodily attraction and common interests; it was comfortable to live, eat, sleep together, and keep it the whole way. Relationships will not build themselves and will not save this desire and joint investment. Often people take the end of romantic love as the end of love, but this is not so. Love begins when falling in love ends, but love may not begin, and if you expect that you will want your partner as you did at the beginning of your acquaintance, this is simply immaturity.

The degree of satisfaction with sex in a couple is about intimacy and trust. If trust is undermined, then sexual desire is also reduced. If you do not learn to trust, then all relationships with other people will end in disappointment and not in the value of what was between you.

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