How to Be Calm on a First Date

13.07.2023

How to not be nervous on a first date? Just the thought of an upcoming first date can be stressful. You may not know what to talk about or doubt that you are able to arouse sympathy from your companion. Thoughts like these can cause serious anxiety when it comes to a first date. However, there are several ways to keep a positive attitude and calmness on the first date.

How to get over first-date anxiety?

• Tell your partner that you are nervous. Yes, this is a radical solution. Although movie culture, various TV shows, and friend advice say that a first date requires a killer outfit, perfectly styled hair, and lots of funny stories. But it's just not realistic. We are complex, busy people who experience emotions, so it's normal to let your date know you're a little nervous. Being open about your nerves will set the tone for an honest conversation and also help you connect with someone who probably feels the same way.

• Find the root of your insecurities. The most important thing is to fight not with excitement but with its main cause. This can often be a bad experience, social phobia, or childhood trauma. If the excitement does not go away, you should contact a psychologist to help you understand yourself. It is necessary to understand where anxiety before a date and self-doubt came from, which led to anxiety before a date. So to speak, consider the root cause of a person's behavior. Perhaps it was a bad experience in the past. This may be a general trend in a person's life - he is a sociophobe and is afraid of contact with people. Perhaps this was due to childhood trauma. All this needs to be worked out with a specialist since any practical advice may be ineffective. The specialist will help to understand the underlying causes of unrest.

How to calm down before a date?

When you're worried about whether your partner will like you, you put all your energy into presenting the best version of yourself. But remember, your companion will want to impress you too! Perhaps one of the most important things to remember when dating is that you both put yourself out there and hope to connect. This takes practice, but try to approach each meeting with the mindset that other people will also be gathering like you. This will give you a confidence boost. Then focus on how you feel about the date and whether you want to see the person again.

• Visualize the first date. By imagining all sorts of options for a first date, you can completely get rid of the excitement. Visualize the events that may await you at the meeting. It is necessary to prepare in advance, choose clothes, and come up with topics for conversation. Figuratively speaking, if you have a clear date scenario in your head that you have visualized and have already played for yourself several times, then the state of nervousness will gradually pass, as this will help calm you down before a romantic meeting.

• Meeting with a friend. How to relax before a date? The best way to calm your nerves on a first date is to make it look like you're meeting a potential new friend. This will reduce the need to act in a certain way and help you feel more comfortable. Plus, you can meet a new friend! By approaching a date with curiosity and seeing it as an opportunity to learn something new, you shift your focus from yourself to the experience.

• Plan your date ahead of time. While spontaneous, surprise dates can be really fun; there's nothing wrong with weighing the planning process if you're prone to dating anxiety. Do you have a great local bar like your second home? Favorite place for coffee that you know, like the back of your hand? Choosing a location that you are familiar with can really help calm the butterflies and put your mind at ease. If staying in your area doesn't suit your date, then plan a date together: be sure to choose an event or place where both of you are comfortable. Prioritizing your safety and enjoyment is the basis for a great dating experience.

• Reduce online communication if you have a first Tinder date nervous. First of all, you need to communicate more with people in everyday life. Gadgets and social networks are, of course, good inventions, but they are the most common reasons today that people cannot find a common language with a companion on a first date. All such fears are formed, as a rule, on the basis of self-doubt when the primary contacts do not take place in real life but in virtual. Unfortunately, because of this, people forget what normal communication with living people is. Therefore, it is necessary to dose virtual communication and move on to real. Little by little, gradually, but decisively. It may not be worth it to immediately go headlong into a love relationship, but practicing real communication is very useful. Spend more time with friends or family in a live format.

• Nothing to lose. How to calm your nerves before a date? It may seem harsh but remember that you go on a first date with nothing, and it's cool if you leave with nothing too. You date this new person to get to know them better and see if the two of you have potential, but if you don't, that's fine. You can have fun on a date, and if the person doesn't appreciate you, you won't have to see them again unless you want to. Freeing yourself from the expectations and pressure to find someone is hard, but when you do, you'll find that first dates are a lot more fun.

• Don't think bad. People love to think about what will happen if something goes wrong. Such thoughts not only lead to despondency and feelings of helplessness but also increase the production of stress hormones. Don't focus on negative thoughts if you want to be charming and laid-back on your first date. As soon as you feel a gloomy thought ripening in your head, try not to pay attention; just let it go. Consider that a negative thought is just one of many thousands. They are joyful and sad, exciting and not very exciting, but they all pass, and this thought will also pass.

• Don't follow "smart" advice. Why do we get nervous before a date? Books often give advice on what to do to look attractive. You can follow all these rules: dress properly, laugh at his jokes or tell jokes, and make the right gestures, but in the end, you will not achieve the desired result. Instead of worrying about how you look and what people think of you, try to learn more about the person you want to impress.

You can register GoDateNow here. You will find a potential partner and possibly a friend. Here you can start chatting with people from different countries, which increases your chances of meeting the right person. In this way, you can save time and at the same time meet a person from another country who shares your interests. Meet a girl in the Girls online gallery. And in Our Dating Blog, you can learn more about online dating and communication, as well as how you can build healthy relationships even at a distance.