How to fall in love after 50 years

10.07.2023

Can you find love after 50? It seems that getting married after 50 years, and even more so for love, is impossible. Fairy tales, great luck, miracles, a one-in-a-hundred chance. However, this is not quite true. If you set out to find a life partner is quite possible.

Finding your love, a loved one, and building a harmonious relationship with him is possible at any age.

Each life milestone has its own charms and shortcomings: for example, a woman after 50 can be well-groomed, attractive, she is intellectually and spiritually developed, and knows a lot about herself, which means she understands better what kind of partner she needs, with whom she will be comfortable and interesting.

Men after 50 also better understand what kind of partner they need, and if they see that a woman is suitable for them, they seek to start a family without unnecessary delay. If young people are more likely to think, check, and compare, then a mature man, as a rule, takes a decisive step much faster.

But there are prejudices that prevent finding love after divorce at 50, taking a step towards your dream, and arranging your personal life.

4 main myths about marriage after 50

How to find love after 50? Many are used to living with an eye on others: what people say, what they think is indecent. Meanwhile, prejudices only interfere with life and limit freedom and happiness. It's time to get rid of them.

• "I'm already old." Some women just say so: "I'm too old for all this!" Perhaps, a couple of centuries ago, this opinion would have been difficult to dispute, but, dear women, we live in the 21st century: today, 50 is the new 30. Do not deny yourself the pleasure of finally living the way you want, doing what you dreamed of, and marrying not a prince but a real king. And what does "old" mean? If we are talking about the fact that there are wrinkles and the figure is no longer the same, then you need to start taking care of yourself and love yourself and your body in order to have love after 50. And if there is no sparkle in your eyes, then you need a goal - then finding a life partner is not an inspirational idea. And the sparkle in the eyes will appear, and the reason to look fresh and young will be.

• “Children will not understand and will condemn me.” Teenage children can cause a lot of trouble for parents who decide to start finding a soulmate after 50. But the task of a woman as a mother is to explain to her child how important love and warmth are in life. Even if not from the first conversation, the teenager will definitely become stronger in this belief over time. If we are talking about adult children, then, as a rule, they, on the contrary, are glad and happy and do not condemn their parents. No matter how old he may be, every loving child wishes happiness and goodness to his parents. And suppose you see bewilderment and anxiety in their eyes. In that case, this is an occasion to sit over a cup of aromatic tea and discuss everything - you are close people, and you will agree and understand each other.

• "I'm used to living alone and the way I want." how to find a mate after 50? A well-established life and an established schedule our comfort zone. And this is only an illusory happiness. Such a sagging sofa - and it's a pity to throw it away, and it seems like nothing else. To find happiness, fill life with colors and emotions, and breathe deeply, you need to get out of your comfort zone and start moving and acting. By the way, changing your habits with a suitable and understanding man will only be a pleasure.

• “I often get sick; who needs me like that?” Feeling unwell, having heart problems, or having joint problems can really be scary, depressing, and frustrating. But in general, everyone has such “troubles”, and everyone has their own. Therefore, the state of health certainly should not become an obstacle to true love. After all, this is precisely the “state” - it is in your power to change it, improve it! All these blinders prevent a woman from finding happiness. Being a prisoner of such beliefs, let alone getting married, you don’t want to live! But there are still several decades of life ahead, and it would be much better to cast aside prejudices and spend these years interestingly, richly, walking hand in hand with your beloved man.

Obstacles that prevent falling in love at 50

As you know, there are no ugly women, so it makes no sense to blame appearance, wrinkles, or “too wide bone” for loneliness.

• Comparison with former partners. If the previous experience was not very successful, a woman may be disappointed in the opposite sex, and a new relationship seems to her an unjustified risk. And vice versa: the widow, who had deep feelings for her dead husband and idealized him, does not believe that she will again be able to experience the same for someone else. Most often, a woman subconsciously compares candidates for marriage partners with her ex-spouse or lover, and the relationship ends at the slightest discrepancy (or vice versa). You should understand yourself, and if the reason really lies in comparing someone from previous passions, it is important to understand that there are no absolutely identical men in character and appearance; each of them has its own shortcomings and advantages, and your task is to consider them more closely from the point of view of not the "former," but the "present and future" lady of the heart.

• Stereotypes often get in the way of understanding what is possible to find love after 50. Single women often have complexes about their age. Like, they will condemn, they will not understand. Those who consider marriage after 50 years too extravagant act remain single until the end of their lives, while others are open to relationships and have every chance to meet old age next to a worthy man.

• Health problems. Of course, when an illness torments, it’s not up to finding love after 50. An illness knocks you out of strength and spoils your mood. Do not postpone a visit to the doctor if something is bothering you. You will always have time to make new acquaintances and relationships, but you can’t joke with health. Do not forget that health comes from within: set your thoughts on the positive, even if it seems that everything is bad around you, and now your sore knee will always prevent you from enjoying life. Turn this activity (positive thinking) into a daily exercise, and you will notice how your health improves, and you can be your own best doctor.

• Reluctance to change habits. This reason can also be located deep in the subconscious of a woman who has been living alone for a long time.

• Excessive attachment to children and grandchildren. Of course, being a caring mother and grandmother is wonderful, but this does not at all exclude the possibility of finding a mate after 50. Personal time and space should be at any age, and you should not become too attached to your descendants because, sooner or later, they will create their own families.

How to find love at 50 and start a relationship?

Now everyone meets on the Internet. The choice of sites is huge, there are many dating applications, but young people actively use them. And the older they are over 45, the worse women adapt the possibilities of the Internet into their lives. And here, too, you can distinguish and work on the reasons: the first is the already mentioned “limiting beliefs,” and the second is technical skills.

It is important to remember that searching on websites and in applications is a real marathon. Women who have found a partner using the Internet say that the search takes at least six months. That is, you need to tune in to be present on the sites for a long time.

If you do it yourself and do not hire an assistant (there is such a service), then it takes you 4 to 6 hours a day. Yes, it's a real job, but success comes to the hardworking.

Before you find love in your 50s, you must go through about 100 applicants, correspond with them, make appointments, and - most importantly - endure their rejections and your frustrations with failures. This, frankly, is not easy, and the support of a psychotherapist at this stage is also not the last thing.

Why so many, you ask? The probability of meeting and creating relationships work on large numbers - there is such a law of mathematics, and it would be good to remember it. Usually, on the first/third/tenth/-eleventh date, you will fail again, and the possibility of falling into one of your traumas (vulnerability, negativism, your own imperfection, or any other). Overwhelmed by frustration, you may want to quit ("useless," "it's not for me") and quit the game. The right decision here is to go to psychotherapy and understand how you can strengthen yourself psychologically for further search. 

After registering on GoDateNow, you can start getting to know different potential partners. Here you can start chatting with different people, and when you are ready, you can make a date. This way, you can save time and not necessarily go on dates with people who are not suitable for you. Meet a girl in the Girls online gallery. And in Our Dating Blog, you can learn more about online dating and communication, as well as how you can build healthy relationships even at a distance.