Long Distance Relationships: Tips for Maintaining
24.05.2023
How to succeed in a long-distance relationship? Relationships at a distance - an invention of the young maximalist consciousness or the worst nightmare of any lover? “Distance” is a relative concept: it can be another city, another country, or even another continent. But the question that hundreds of couples who have agreed to a long-distance relationship ask themselves is always the same: how not to go crazy with the grief of separation if it takes weeks or even months to wait for the next meeting with your loved one?
Tips for a long distance relationship
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Set boundaries. You still need to decide where your relationship will go after separation “on the shore.” Long-distance relationships will require more moral resources from you than the type of relationship we are used to, so it is best to save yourself from unnecessary hassle and senseless suffering in advance. There is nothing shameful in the fact that you do not plan to move in, buy a small cozy forest house and give birth to children. If, at the moment, it is enough for you to meet once or twice in a couple of months, drive together at sea and have a good time with each other, then why not. It’s just that you need to decide what you still expect from these relationships, set priorities and set boundaries as soon as possible and this is the main advice for a long distance relationship.
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Calls. Online communication is your lifeline. The ability to talk with a partner on any topic, discuss plans for the future and just share your life is the number one must for any relationship. But when it comes to long-distance, Skype or WhatsApp conversations also compensate for the lack of bodily communication (kisses, touches, hugs). Being open and open to dialogue will help you take your relationship to a whole new level. The ability to share your problems, fears, and anxieties and express your dissatisfaction or concern are incredibly important skills for any relationship in general, but especially for long-distance relationships.
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Confidence. What does having a long-distance relationship mean? “Jealousy is a monster that both conceives and gives birth to itself,” said Shakespeare. And the writer certainly knew about love no less than modern Romeo and Juliet suffering from separation. Going crazy with jealousy when you don’t know where and with whom your partner can actually be right now is not the best prospect. The feeling of jealousy that constantly haunts you, the fear of being deceived, and the unceasing desire to control the life of your partner are serious reasons to work through the moments that concern you with a specialist. Well, if your partner now and then deliberately throws you reasons for jealousy, it may be worth asking a question about the seriousness of his intentions and your relationship. how to handle a long distance relationship? Trust should be the axiom of your relationship. You don't need another city or even another district of your city to cheat on, and the feeling that distance gives more reasons for jealousy is completely false. If you are not ready to trust your partner, ask yourself: are you ready to build a relationship with him?
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Learn to live for yourself. The phrase “I really live only with you” only at first glance sounds very romantic. In fact, it hides a type of relationship that American psychologists would describe as an "unhealthy relationship." Undoubtedly, rare meetings with your loved one allow you to experience hundreds of positive emotions in three times, but it is important to remember that in between these infrequent dates, life goes on. Breaking up can be a great push to do something new. At the very least, to kill time that you could waste in tears and endless self-pity. Maybe you have long wanted to enroll in the hall. Or were there a dozen or two unread books lying around in the bookcase? Think about the opportunity to spend your free time with friends or even master the art of going to the movies alone (sometimes catching zen is even easier than during meditation!). It is the ability to live without a partner that will help you maintain a long distance relationship. Learn to enjoy the life around you alone and take the time to explore yourself and learn new things. So the time until the next meeting with your soul mate will fly by much faster.
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Create a sense of presence. How to be in a long distance relationship? In order not to once again remind yourself and your partner that kilometers separate you, try to make your online communication as less virtual as possible. For example, if you regularly celebrate some important date together, why not pour yourself some wine and clink glasses right through your computer monitor? Do not abandon your usual rituals and traditions just because you cannot be around right now. And for your calls, it is not necessary to choose a secluded room and put on makeup. You can talk and cook dinner, talk while going to a meeting, when walking down the street, or even while sitting in the bathroom. And the message “Good morning” on the smartphone screen will help brighten up the sadness of lonely morning awakenings.
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Don't forget about sex. How to enjoy a long distance relationship? The lack of intimacy during a long-distance relationship is one of the most difficult tests for lovers. While you do not have the opportunity to express your feelings through touching, hugging and kissing, you can develop the ability to talk and write about sex and your sexual fantasies, express your desires, and discuss with your partner various sexual practices that you would like to try next time you meet. For those who have never experienced a long-distance relationship, sexting may seem like vulgarity, perversion, and dirty fun, but in fact, it is a great way to maintain the emotional and intimate life of your relationship at the proper level during the period of separation.
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Regular meetings. How to keep a long distance relationship? No matter how cozy and warm your Skype evenings are and no matter how eventful your daily routine is, meetings after a long separation will still be the most joyful and enjoyable moment of your personal life. And the best thing to brighten up the expectation of the next rendez-vous is the confidence that this meeting will still take place. Sometimes she will have to wait a month, two, or three, but a precisely appointed date of date on a subconscious level will help make the waiting process not so painful and stressful.
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Spend holidays together. How to prepare for a long distance relationship? Make shared vacation and holiday plans so you can spend more time together. And if you have a choice to meet every couple of months for one or two days or for a week every six months, it is better to choose the first option. This will allow you to keep your relationship in good shape for longer.
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Send photos and videos to each other. How to work on a long distance relationship? We receive almost 80% of the information when communicating non-verbally, so in long-distance relationships, it is especially important to be able to see the face of a loved one more often - his facial expressions and lively emotions, to be charged with his mood. This way, you can maintain an emotional connection with your partner. This will allow you to better understand what state he is in now and what feelings he really experiences, as well as to track the appearance of negative trends in relationships in time and have time to work them out in time.
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Support each other. When a loved one is far away, and you do not have the opportunity to see him and feel support, you can become psychologically vulnerable to react more painfully to criticism; it is harder to experience difficulties at work and get upset over small things. And all because of the fact that it is important for every person to feel loved and understood. Therefore, try to compliment your partner, rejoice at his achievements together and not criticize his mistakes.
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Pay attention to yourself. Things to help a long distance relationship. There should always be time for yourself and your hobbies in a relationship. Don't spend your life waiting for a call or a meeting. Use separation as an opportunity to get, for example, additional education, go to courses or the gym, see friends with whom you still could not arrange a meeting, or learn a new sport.
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