How To Play Hard To Get In A Relationship

28.03.2023

How to play hard to get in a relationship? Think back to your relationship. At some point, intimacy becomes a routine, and you want to experience kisses, or there is no desire at all to get close to a seemingly loved one. Playfulness disappears, and there is no animal desire to pounce on each other as soon as you are left alone. Increasingly, you want to separate and go about your own business, and in the end, you disperse, or betrayals begin, which, one way or another, lead to divorce and separation. So sometimes, you need to play hard to get into a relationship.

Passion passes after about 3-6 months, in rare cases after a year - and this is normal. Your hormones calm down, you get used to being in love, and you begin to see reality. Instead of an ideal image, a practically different person appears, whose habits are already familiar to you and even annoying, he becomes predictable, and this also unbalances you, however, like him. In a fit of passion, we do not notice the essence of a person since everyone at the beginning of a relationship strives to be the best version of himself.

As soon as the first passionate stage of the relationship is passed, we have more and more “important things” conflicts, and the grinding stage begins, which many couples do not go through, as the brain turns on. At this moment, thoughts arise: “Why do I need all this? I’m doing fine alone / alone; why should I be nervous, change, or bend because of someone? To avoid such situations, you need to figure out what does playing hard to get means.

When passion disappears, you need to understand whether there is something else for a person, love or love, or maybe there is a desire to just be with him. If you can return passion, then with another, it is much more difficult.

Try looking at your partner with admiration more often.

The strongest attraction to a person is when he is passionate about something that he really likes. Try to watch your partner as they do what they do best. And to catch the feeling that right now he is basking in the rays of glory. This feeling of inaccessibility of a partner maximizes sexual desire.

How do you play hard to get?

• Maintain autonomy from your partner. This is one of the important texting rules to play hard to get. For many of us, the image of love is associated with the image of fusion. And the more complete and exhaustive this merging is, the stronger love seems to be. Because of this, any attempt to take your piece of autonomy causes many difficulties, especially if only one partner needs this autonomy. But in fact, the partnership is not the same as merging because there is no distance in merging. And desire survives only if each of the partners retains personal space. Therefore, try to encourage the autonomy of the partner's interests. And allow yourself (if necessary, defend) the right to have hobbies you will not share with him.

• Remember that your sex life with yourself is incredibly important, so playing hard to get meaning is important. Relationships are not a subscription to sex. Many people think that while they are not in a couple, they can masturbate, watch porn, buy sex toys, and so on. But as soon as a partner appears, he becomes not only the main but also the only source of sexual satisfaction. But in reality, each of us is supposed to have two sexual lives: with the participation of other people and with ourselves. And this just can help balance the inconsistency of sexual desires - what turns out to be unclaimed in partner sex goes into solo activities. In addition, the solo life gives the feeling that no one but you has power over your body.

• Don't try to conform. How to play hard to get as a guy? Many people have an idea that there is some kind of healthy “normal sex,” and they want to have a regular partner. As with casual partners, you can experiment and realize your fantasies, and in a long-term relationship, this is not permissible. And often, people who have such limits love their partners very much, but they want to have sex with someone else. Feeling that you do not conform to some sexual norm makes you unhappy and unsatisfied. Because often, practices that are considered normal are far from being enjoyable for everyone. Most women can't get an orgasm from penetrative sex alone. Therefore, loosen the concept of “normal in sex” inside yourself, and forget about the words “abnormal,” “perverted,” and “sick” when you talk about sexual desires.

• Forget erogenous zones. By itself, the idea of dividing the body into zones that are associated with sex and into zones that have nothing to do with it is fundamentally wrong. When we are excited, the whole body becomes one continuous erogenous zone. If we are tired, irritated, offended, we are cold, or scared, even the most sexual parts of our body become insensitive. What then is the practical meaning of dividing the body into sexual and non-sexual zones? This limits our imagination and demotivates us from studying each other. At the same time, often, those areas of the body that are not considered erogenous can bring much more pleasure, for example, foot massage.

• Look for "points of entry" to sex. How to play hard to get over text? The attitude that sex should always be spontaneous is a hopelessly unrealistic and somewhat selfish view of sexual relationships. That is, it turns out that in some extraordinary way, the partner must feel that you want intimacy right now, do something special to excite you, and then you will have amazing sex. But in reality, spontaneous sex is more about shifting responsibility to a partner. This means you don't have to do anything; you don't have to check your own state, you don't have to hear "no," and so on. All this happens because we treat sex as a gift, so it's important to play hard to get with a woman. In fact, for sex to be good, you need to look for “entry points.” These may be some of your personal internal rituals, for example, when one says: “I’m in the shower, don’t fall asleep without me,” and the second clearly understands this signal. Or such a ritual can be a massage if you agree to it. It is such a veiled but conscious invitation to the space of intimacy.

• Improve your sexual competence. Should I play hard to get with her? By taking courses, webinars, and training about sex, we invest time, effort, and money in the development of our own sexuality. And as a result, we increase our sexual self-esteem and the priority of this area for our libido. It gives a great sense of support because it's very easy to say or write, "Appreciate yourself for who you are." In fact, we are all, in one way or another, directly or indirectly, looking for evidence that we are great at sex. But it is important to invest in yourself not out of fear (that you will be abandoned, out of love, exchanged for someone sexier, etc.), but out of self-love.

• Do not force your partner to work on relationships and sex. Be an example for him, to do, playing hard to get work. If a partner has no desire, he does not see a problem, and everything suits him, you cannot do anything with him. Because in working with sex, any hint of pressure causes rejection. What is playing hard to get? But you can work with relationships on your own. And the person who lives with you will sooner or later become interested in what kind of book about sex you have been reading so enthusiastically for the fifth day already. And then, when he himself takes a step, you can invite him to connect with you. But remember that the process of working on a relationship is not the same as working on a “partner” who does something wrong or does not understand you, or whatever. Any work on relationships begins with working on oneself with one's own attitudes, behavior, and reactions.

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