Signs Your Boyfriend Is a Beta Male

27.03.2019

In everyday life, we can observe different types of men. Some are courageous and self-confident, others are nice non-conflicting guys, and still others are mother's boys who are running away from responsibility.

Such differences of men have given birth to a kind of classification, which become widespread on the Internet. Conventionally, men can be divided into several groups according to their interaction with each other and women's attitude – these are alpha, beta, and omega males. The basis of this classification is taken by the long-standing idea of the zoologist David Mech. Exploring the social structure of the wolf pack, he called its leader the alpha male. Although later, the scientist recognized the falsity of his theory and suggested that it is better to call the leader of the pack the wolf-father instead of the alpha male. The zoological hierarchy of domination has appealed to many people and gained the right to separate existence. Everyone might have heard about alpha males. Today we are going to find the answer to the question, “What is a beta male”?

What Is a Beta Male?

Although a beta man is something between alpha and omega, he cannot be considered just as a mixture of the traits of these two groups. Why? Because alpha and omega have opposite behavioral patterns, such an alpha-omega Frankenstein would be too controversial and unpredictable. The main task of the dominance hierarchy is to harmonize society but not to bring chaos. Beta males have some kind of hybridity, but at the same time, they have developed some third style of behavior, different from alpha and omega.

How to define a beta male? A beta male is quite an attractive man who is less socially dominant than alpha. Nevertheless, he is self-confident and attracts the attention of women. At the party, beta males are good friends of alpha who flirts with the most beautiful women, but beta men are popular only with those women who have not received attention from the alpha male. Beta males love women and look at romantic relationships with optimism. Those beta men who are closer to the alpha type harbor have no particular illusions about women, while beta men who are closer to omega (and this is the vast majority of beta males) tend to idealize and glorify women. A beta man is always ready to participate in any event, organized by alpha. As a rule, the partner of the beta male is one of the ex-girlfriends of the alpha male. Let's find out the difference between alpha and beta male.

Alpha Male vs Beta Male

Despite many cultural and social demands, there is a popular belief that a modern alpha male is a dominant and polygamous man. These are his two main natural characteristics. By nature, alpha men have physical strength, endurance, willpower, resistance to stress and conflicts, high testosterone level, excellent health, ability to achieve goals and adapt to environmental conditions. That is why many men want to learn how to stop being a beta male. Nature has endowed alpha men with such qualities for good reason. The task of alpha males is the transfer of viable genes and procreation. After all, all women want to have healthy children.

However, not all brazen, courageous, and self-confident men are actually alpha males. The ostentatious arrogance and self-confidence are often the qualities of beta males, who either hide their complexes in such a way or try to compete with alpha males for a leading position in the hierarchy. In fact, beta males have a softer character and a less contrary disposition, but at the same time, they are sly and smart. These are the qualities that help them move up the career ladder and even “move away” the masculine alpha males who have failed to adapt to modern realities. It is worth noting that beta males make up 80% of all men. However, a lot of them try to learn how not to be a beta male.

Also, beta males are successful in family life. They are excellent family men who are ready to do everything for the sake of the happiness of their loved ones. There is even such a common belief that women fall pregnant to faithless alpha males, and caring beta males raise their children. Although this is a controversial statement as modern alpha males can also be family men.

Beta Male Traits

Let's move to beta male personality. Do you often wonder, “Am I a beta male?” Now, we are going to show all the aces. These are 11 the most specific beta male characteristics.

1. Lack of principles. Beta males do not have consistent messages, life principles, and strict moral standards. Principles are dangerous to the beta as they can lead to conflict with alpha individuals. Morality for such a man is only a means to achieve the goal and a reason for passive aggression. The consequence of the lack of principles is low requirements for themselves, combined with severe requirements for others. A beta male conveniently "forgets" about morality, when it is unfavorable for him.
2. The need for constant communication and emotional nourishment. In friendship, beta men focus on cheering others up and creating a positive atmosphere. This is important because a beta male requires constant emotional nourishment. Without emotional support, a beta is forced to change his hierarchical position. At the same time, beta-friendship is more universal because such a person can find friends almost everywhere. You can rely on beta men in a difficult situation if you are very dear to them. In this case, the beta will do everything possible to help you, and he can even take responsibility to rise in your eyes.
3. The illusion of an alpha male. It is one of the most obvious signs of a beta male. A beta guy always tries to get a large piece of the pie, like alpha, but without taking any responsibility. This is achieved by pretending to be an alpha man. Beta males talk a lot and do little, expecting others to do the work for them. Unlike an omega, a beta wants the work to be done, but by someone else, he is not going to soil his hands with it. A beta man always tries to get into elite clubs, that is, to gain status, not at the expense of great efforts but thanks to the membership of the "cool" group.
4. Lack of big goals. A beta man does not have a strategic view of the situation. The strategy is usually set by alpha males. A beta male tries to turn any situation in his favor, even in the prejudice of the common cause. For example, a beta-phenomenon at the state level is corruption, when individual beta males profit from the deterioration of living conditions of those around them. The big goal is often chosen "just ornamental."
5. Creating social connections. This is probably the only clear goal that a beta man has, and this is his main strength. Beta males avoid direct conflicts and always want to "be friends" with others and please people. For such a man, friendship is a form of self-defence. Behind the back of his "friend," a beta can be passively aggressive. A beta makes low demands on “his people” and requires the same attitude to himself. He demands respect for himself not on the basis of good deeds but because "we are friends." A beta man requires dialogue but often has no idea what to say.
6. Wishful thinking. A beta creates the most pleasant version of reality. For example, the one in which he is the most intelligent and beautiful, surrounded by idiots and mediocrities. A beta guy does not think critically because such a way of thinking can lead to conflicts with alpha. A beta always says superficial courtesies to friends, without getting to the heart of the matter. A beta friend will say, "Yes, of course, you can do it!" without even realizing the real chances of the interlocutor. He considers his task to be emotional support and encouragement, not a solution to the problem.
7. Substance over form. For a beta male, it does not matter how things really are. It is important how everything looks from the outside. For such a man, it is more important to seem like someone than being someone. A beta guy is convinced that if he hides his own shortcomings and mistakes, then they are not there at all. A beta draws a beautiful shell, which he does not match. For example, a beta can talk a lot about morality and ethics because it sounds beautiful but not because he acts morally.
8. The average result. Beta men often achieve average results in their endeavors. That is, it is not masterhood (alpha males) but at the same time, not a complete fiasco (omega males). Beta men like the feeling of "normality," they feel comfortable in it. They avoid prominent results because such progress transfers them into the position of alpha males that requires big responsibility. Beta male achieves prominent results when the task is to create social connections and communicate with people – entertainment, mass media, personnel management, pedagogy, etc. For example, most successful bloggers belong to beta.
9. Provocativeness. Beta men love to provoke actions from others but not to act themselves. They are convinced that everyone around them should do something for them and meet some requirements, but they are not obliged to do anything. Beta men never put a situation in perspective, they purposefully turn it for their own benefit. A beta male constantly requires exceptions to the rules for himself, this is also an element of provocation.
10. Emotionality. A beta guy tends to concentrate on emotions, instead of actions. His feelings and experiences are the most important. A beta male is convinced that he is doing some important work, for example, feeling that he "improves someone's mood." Emotions are very important in making social connections. But it does not mean that beta men are experts in emotions. Beta males are characterized by theatricality, they always need the public. Emotions of alpha males are less insincere as they have been achieved through real-life sufferings.
11. Self-obsession. A beta male is characterized by egocentrism. He talks a lot about himself and is convinced that everyone is eager to know his emotions and feelings. Therefore, beta males often look like some alpha, but alpha males become self-centred because they know that a lot depends on them. A beta is narcissistic because his main goal is to attract attention, create social connections, and raise his own social status. Stealing the show is his natural reflex. At the same time, self-obsession is not necessarily positive. A beta guy is convinced that everything that happens in the world is connected with him, including the bad. For example, a beta man will be sure that he is the cause of his partner’s bad mood.

Do Women Prefer Dating a Beta Male?

The consumer society imposes its own standards, but our natural instincts are indestructible. Therefore, now, like many millions of years ago, women choose alpha males to give birth to healthy offspring. But some do it wisely and choose alpha men who are well-adapted to the modern world, and some choose the delusive appearance, starting relationships with "bad guys" who can only "use, abuse and refuse." And yet, a small number of alpha males are not enough for all women. Therefore, the overwhelming majority of women start dating a beta male who is committed and reliable. With such a man, a woman can create a family nest and live happily. Moreover, a beta man will always help with the children. However, strong women who are prone to dominant behavior can choose omega males, and then complain all their lives that there are no real men left.

The main factor in the correct understanding of the dynamics of romantic relationships between opposite sexes is a clear picture of the socio-sexual hierarchy existing in the world of men. Look at the surrounding men and try to determine their type. Of course, all men are different, but you can still attribute them to one of these three types, and then draw the appropriate conclusions. Find your loved one and be happy!