Texting between first and second date
25.11.2020
A time between the first and the second date can be the most awkward period for people who like each other. Should you text them immediately? How long to wait for a second date? Do you play it cool or confess your feelings already? Is it too soon? Do you take their number or keep texting till the second date comes? Generally, people from all over the world are interested in a guide on how to date. What are your chances to meet them after an awkward text? And, most importantly, how long should it take to miss each other and meet up again?
What to consider before asking for a second date
How long to wait after first date for second date? Is there any informal rule that should help you? Psychologists agree that the period of dating is different for every couple. Some like each other instantly, so the passion moves the connection. Others are more timid, shy, or just think twice. But what do you consider when asking for a second date?
1. The vibe of a date
Did you two like each other instantly, almost holding hands during the first date? Then you shouldn’t hesitate to ask your partner out immediately. But if the vibe was weird and awkward, you should wait till things settle a bit. Did you get a positive reaction when touching upon sincere topics? Were they quick to open up about their feelings and trepidations? When your date gives you the green light, even the next day would be okay. Moreover, they must be dreaming about the next meeting too. But if you felt some resistance, hold back as well. Text your new bae after two days, or don’t talk about the date yet.
2. They want to connect all the time
If your date was asking lots of questions, leaning towards you, and overall gave all the signs of attraction, there is no need to hold back for a week. Just say that you are looking forward to seeing them again. If your date texts you first, took your number, or already knew it, it means that you are in their comfort zone. You made things less complicated already by taking down your walls. Now it is only a matter of time before moving to the next stage.
3. They agreed during the first date
How long to wait for second date? Even if you didn’t make a direct appointment, just throw it in and casually mention that you are waiting for the next date. What is their immediate reaction? Do they smile awkwardly, smirk as it will never happen, or even admit that things move too quickly? You know these are just small lies that indicate many things. Either the person who was on a date was too shy because you seemed perfect, and once they run out of adrenaline, it would be next to impossible to call you later. Or they just spent a date in boredom, didn’t feel you that much, or went to a date because of politeness. Alas, it happens.
How long to wait after first date for second date?
There are no direct rules on how long to wait after first date. Some people agree that you need to do it as quickly as possible; others are not as pumped to immediately see their new date. Some might say that having a gap too long might set a weird mood, like nobody is interested in the connection. Others reckon, saying that there won’t be enough time to dream and replay a splendid date in their head, as these things should be more memorable. So what’s the line between fast food dates and a total blowoff? Rumor has it, the average time between first and second date is one-two weeks. Why should you wait for a week or so, not more or less? Planning up a blitz second date might set a wrong tone unless you REALLY liked each other. It might be okay to dig your date that much, but are they okay to meet up tomorrow? Don’t you have stuff to do, work to attend, errands to run? By setting the second date already, you fall into the category of insecure partners that want to seal the deal too soon or a jobless lad that doesn’t have anything better to do. By waiting more than two weeks, you can send a red flag. “What does it take them so long? Why do they hesitate to ask me out? Am I not attractive enough? Things were going so well!”
That is why a gap between first and second dates should not exceed more than two weeks. And don’t forget to text each other meanwhile! People who don’t text in between dates send a wrong vibe of being uninterested and making someone their booty call.
Texting between first and second date: rules and tips
Let’s say the time between first and second date passes. What do you text each other in the meantime? Texting between first and second date should be a separate science, as there are two ways to either both your connection or help it tremendously. So what do you ask in between the meals?
1. Ask each other about your interests
Since the first date usually looks like an awkward interview, you want to fill the gaps. What things don’t you know yet about each other? It’s time to finish the quiz and get more knowledge. Talk about your hobbies. What are their favorite shows? Do they read books or magazines? Do they keep up with current events?
2. Feed new information
To avoid the love drought, you need to keep the conversation entertaining. Since knowing their tastes can be perplexing, you need to base off of something you already know. If they like news, send useful links to fresh articles and videos, feed information from well-known portals, and send songs and movies you liked today. Discuss topics and current events to become good friends first.
3. Learn about their tastes
If you know about their tastes, it will be easier to bring a thoughtful gift on the next date. Your partner would probably know where this is going since not everyone asks about your favorite flowers or sweets. Additionally, you will win some points as an attentive interlocutor and a hopeless romantic. The only rule you need to follow is taking into consideration everything they say. This part is tricky as we all are humans, and we all make mistakes. The attention span of humans is less than a goldfish’s, and it is scientifically proven. But if you forget about things you intentionally asked your date, it can sabotage your relationship forever. For example, if your date said they are allergic to seafood, and after asking you to order a shrimp cocktail, don’t think you will ever fall into their good graces. There is nothing shameful in writing facts down if you really want to remember them.
4. Flirt more
Since the average time between first and second dates is more than a week, spend this time wisely. You have a perfect chance to come out of an imaginary friend zone and meet each other for the second time as romantic partners. You shouldn’t waste your time discussing only political, religious, and financial topics. Although it is rude to start sexting your date or sending them nudity, you can at least try to flirt with them. Text them every day with emojis, winky faces, or send normal pictures of your face or clothed body. Be sure to keep a playful note and to avoid being intimidating. If your day doesn’t like where things are going, retreat and try to abstain from flirtatious remarks for some time.
5. Ask them out
If you see that the connection is going great, it is time to hint at another meeting. If your new partner is flirtatious, active, laughs at your jokes, makes some remarks about seeing you again, openly says they are up for a second date, it is time to ask them out and give it another shot. It can happen sooner than in a week or later than two weeks. Either way, you have to be completely fine with both.
The time between the first and second dates can be confusing for most single people, but there shouldn’t be a problem if you already feel connected. In a good relationship, you have to talk openly about your desires and not be afraid to ask additional questions. If your date sends off a positive vibe, you are in luck, as there will definitely be another date and a chance to secure your connection. An attentive partner will not leave you second-guessing, will be open, and in whatever direction things are going, they will never do you wrong.
