Consistency In A Relationship: What is it?

21.07.2020

When you register on a dating site, you look for bright emotions. You want to seem attractive and draw the attention of the best representatives of the opposite sex. The stage of dating is one of the most wonderful ones since it is filled with jittery anticipation and the thrill of the wait. It is about butterflies in the stomach and emotional rollercoaster that also brings a lot of pleasure, expectations, and vivid experiences. It makes you feel alive, so you strive for it till a certain moment. However, when you start reflecting on serious relationships and want to meet real women, an emotional rollercoaster doesn’t seem that attractive. You are interested in other qualities, and it is all about consistency in a relationship.

Consistency in Relationships: What Is It Really?

You might have heard many times that relationships require a lot of work from both partners. If you let it flow, nothing will work out. And a healthy and harmonious relationship is based on important things, and thus, trust and respect are on the list. When someone starts talking about consistency in relationships, it means they are talking about predictability in a good sense. It is about a repeating scenario of reactions and behaviors that allow partners to strengthen a sense of trustworthiness.

Well, some people (especially young ones) may say that to be consistent in a relationship means to be boring or lacking vivid imagination or something alike, but it is not the case. When you have sigma male personality, and you are going to build committed relationships, you want to be calm and relaxed, you want to know that this person will have your back no matter what. It is not about the absence of surprises and the unwillingness to do anything unusual and interesting. It is about a high level of comfortableness when you feel safe next to the person, and you can be sure that you have an exclusive relationship.

Thus, when you are dealing with trust issues, then a consistency relationship is what you need most. Consistency is everything you need to achieve a goal, and it doesn’t matter whether it is about gym workouts and proper nutrition (to finally see your iron abs) or your relationship. When you want to create a sound foundation for your future family life, you need trust, and thus, you should reflect on consistency in a relationship.

Main Signs of Consistency in Relationships

When you fall in love, you dream of waking up next to this amazing person in the morning, have breakfast together and discuss your plans for the evening. This concept means that your beloved one is interested in you and has a crush on you enough to keep trying. They are ready to plan their future with you and invest their energy, time, and efforts. Your partner is ready to have your back and help every time you need them. It is about honesty and a huge desire to stay together through thick and thin. So, what are the main signs?

1. You don’t worry that something is not right

None of the partners need to pretend or act weirdly because consistency speaks for itself. You don’t worry that something goes wrong. Your level of trust and calmness is really high. You don’t wonder or torment yourself with the thoughts about possible motifs of your partner’s behavior. Being consistent in a relationship, a person is always ready to become a shoulder to lean on when you need them. You feel loved and appreciated next to your partner. You feel and see that your partner loves you, so you don’t need to doubt yourself or their feelings.

2. You don’t search for perfection

If earlier you were looking for perfection, then now you are interested in someone to count on. Nobody is perfect, but you still can feel safe and calm next to the person, and it is of much higher importance in committed relationships. The two of you work on yourselves to become a better version, and both of you are ready to try hard to change, which means that you have someone who is always ready to be there for you. It is surprising, but you always know what to expect and what reaction you will evoke with a certain action.

3. You keep promises

Your partner always keeps their word, and you appreciate this quality. While many people can easily promise you something just to get what they want in return, even though they are not going to keep their word, your partner is from another group. You can be sure that if they promise you something, then they will keep their word in any way. They are ready to go the extra mile to make you happy. It is especially important to build a committed relationship with someone who knows the value of the words. And if there is inconsistency in relationships, you cannot be sure about anything they say.

4. You feel that your relationship is special

What is the difference between an ordinary relationship and a special one? The level of romance and attitude of partners towards each other is of great importance. It is about morning kissing before you leave, sending cute messages during the day, or their desire to pick you up from work. All this sweet and pleasant routine finds reflection in numerous consistency in relationships quotes. All these little things create a special atmosphere and give a feeling that your connection is special.

5. You see it in their actions

Some people like to talk about things they are not going to do. Unlike them, a consistent partner is a man of action. They prefer deeds instead of empty talks. You might have met people who are going to “live tomorrow.” They will give up smoking and chocolate tomorrow, go to the gym and start cooking the right food, but as we all know – tomorrow never comes. In the meantime, your partner lets their deeds speak for themselves. Thus, you don’t need to doubt their words because they do more than talk.

6. They don’t change

While many people pretend to be someone they are not, such a person will always be sincere. They don’t wear a mask, so you know who you have fallen in love with and what development of relationships you can expect. You can build plans for the future or at least plan your vacation. They will make you feel happy and safe, so you can relax and enjoy your life together. It is not hard to appreciate such a person because you see how great they are from all sides. And it is a constant thing.

7. You become more responsible

When you are in a relationship with a great person, your level of responsibility increases. If you see that a partner does something pleasant for you, then chances are high that sooner or later, you will want to return the favor. So, you become more responsible and improve your personal qualities, becoming a better person. They say that our environment determines our personal growth. And it seems that's true.

Consistency and Chemistry: the Main Difference

People search for this notorious chemistry when they get back into the dating scene and want to find a suitable partner. They believe that it is the main sign of compatibility and the bright future together. And we are not going to diminish its importance, especially at the beginning of relationships. However, it’s necessary to say that it is not equal to consistency as well as a healthy and happy relationship. And while chemistry appears seemingly by itself since it is an initial feeling that is the result of meeting some biological requirements, then consistency requires effort and work. Chemistry makes you turn a blind eye to your partner’s flaws and worse character traits, and you can hardly control it since it contributes to the production of certain hormones in your body. Usually, its power is still valid during the whole honeymoon period, but as soon as this phase ends, partners will not do without consistency. It determines whether this union will be able to survive and move on. So, while chemistry is responsible for the very start of relationships, consistency is crucial for their success and further development.

How to Reach Consistency in a Relationship?

It may seem at first sight that it is hard to reach consistency in family life, and you either have to work hard (like at the gym), or you should have the talent to behave this way. It is easy to say, “Oh, I will hardly be suitable for such a role.” However, having read all the previous points, you understand the importance of consistency in relationships and that you will not do without it if you want to create a healthy relationship without trust issues and all other aspects that poison and ruin your union from the inside.

1. Let them know how your feelings work

If you have been together for a long time, you might be sure that your partner perfectly knows why you are together and why you love them. However, in most cases, it is not the case. People are prone to doubt themselves, especially if they have some trouble with their self-esteem. So, you should say love words to your significant other and appreciate things they do for you.

2. Create your routine

It is not about washing dishes or doing household chores. You can create some pleasant, for example, morning rituals that will charge you with energy and help enjoy each other’s company. Turn on your imagination and start doing pleasant things for each other. You should see love, and be able to touch it and try.

3. Hug each other without a reason

Scientists have proven that a person needs about 10 hugs per day to feel happy and loved. It is not that difficult but very pleasant to embrace the person you love. So, bring it into life right away. You can add a goodbye kiss here as well. Such things reduce the level of anxiety and help strengthen your connection.

4. Communicate more in a soft manner

Consistency is about frank talks and trust. So, you should work on this “muscle” to make it work right. You should communicate with your partner more often on topics that both of you are interested in. If you don’t have common hobbies, it’s high time you find something. A couple that has something to discuss besides the required shopping list also has better chances to succeed.

5. Exchange messages throughout the day

If you live together, then you may believe that it is a waste of time to exchange messages during the day since you will meet in the evening again anyway. However, this simple trick will help your beloved one feel that you think about them even when you are not in the same room. You should neither neglect such small things nor diminish its effect on a relationship. Each of us wants to feel loved and cherished.

We have discussed the main points that will help you understand your relationship better and the direction of further development. You should challenge yourself by attempts to be consistent in at least one of these items. If you make efforts, you will notice how much your relationship improves and becomes stronger. A healthy and happy union is not a myth but a constant work of both partners that have decided to stay together. It is easy to ruin everything at a glance, and it is harder to create something truly decent.